Yrsa Roca Fannberg



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We Wanted More Emotion! Or?

Last year Barcelona won the league in February, not mathematically, but theoretically, as there was no opponents, they could basically decide when it suited them to celebrate the title (kind of timed due to crucial games in the Champions League). It was almost boring, the title had no emotions, we said at the time. How we were wishing for a strong Madrid to come back, for a Valencia to count on. Now we might not think so anymore. It is never simple enough.

Last year
We remembered the golden times of La Ligas de Tenerife, the titles that were won on the last day of the competition, the very last day and even the very last minute. It was always more due to the failure of the other, rather than by own merit. We remembered how great it felt to almost steal it at the expense of the other. We remember with sentimentality how little we felt for Dukic, who missed that very famous penalty, the one which would have given Deportivo their first ever title, but no he missed it, and Barça who did do their homework won their game and out we all went pouring on the streets in an ecstatic joy. Or those leagues that we won thanks to Tenerife gaining a result against Madrid, that was not once, but twice we won the league in that fashion.
OOOOO how we long for those times, last year, sentimentality was creeping in, the Golden era of the Dream Team, the team that won three out of its four league titles on the last day. But it was never about winning, it was about a certain style, at least at the time, now with Gaspart´s Dark Era in mind, still worn as a scar on the soul we are not so sure anymore. Is it about winning, about humiliating the other or is it about taking sides. How schizophrenic we can be, wishing for all wishes at the same time, causing some kind of a mental crash. Last year was so last year, while we got bored with that, it somehow would have felt quite good to have the title in port, the suffering now is unbearable. How does boredom compare to suffering? Or is it not suffering we are used to? Should we not feel not swim in the sea that feels familiar? But remember with el cul√© nothing is normal and everything is normal. While yesterday seems better, tomorrow seems obscure and the future dark.

 

During the cold winter months, I would distract myself by watching football, rather said, I would watch F.C. Barcelona's games. No other teams.
It is a mixture of two things.
• I find it sane to have a passion for something you can't control, that you canal your emotions through something that is distant from yourself, but you feel part of it, you feel it.
• As a child I would travel to Catalunya to visit my father. I started travelling on my own as a five year old, only speaking Icelandic and after about two weeks I would speak some Catalan as well. I learnt very quickly that if I support Barça it would bring me a sense of belonging. It quickly became my connection with the country my father is from.
These writings are an extension of these two factors.